Some Christian Humour

There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. "Isthere anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk."Only the Ten Commandments." Answered the lady.

Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the
world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say,"Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up inthe morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."

A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large citybecause he was short of time and couldn't find a space witha meter. Then he put a note under the windshield wiper thatread: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here,I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses."When he returned, he found a citation from a police officeralong with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If Idon't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. "Lead us not intotemptation."

There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday andannounced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news.The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our newbuilding program. The bad news is, it's still out there in yourpockets.

"A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air."He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy. "Really? How do you know?"the teacher asked. "You know -Our Father, who does art in Heaven..."

A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, butthere were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motionedhim toward a vacant pump. "Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the lastminute to get ready for a long trip." The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business."

A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied,"What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?" The sonreplied, "I do know!""Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy,Daddy." The young boy replied excitedly, "It stands for'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'"

Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. The daughter answered, "Don't be scared,you'll get your quilt." Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, thePastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about. He said "Be not afraid,thy comforter is coming."